Motherhood 2050: Necced explained

Apparently a few people were confused by my Mother's Day column that was published in the Bellevue Reporter May 10, 2009. Some people stopped reading it when I mentioned a daughter, because they knew I had only sons.

I came up with the idea for the column when my son wanted to get his first tattoo a few years ago. I was mortified- wondering what my dad would think. I told my son he was embarassing me in front of Grampa, and I asked him what he thought his kids would do to rebel, or how they might try to embarrass him in front of me. What if things that are cutting edge and rebellious now eventually become mainstream? I thought maybe the kids of the future would refuse tattoos and cell phones, creating angst for their adorned and media-addicted parents. The word I used, necced, is a short version of "non-connected," made-up slang, as it were. I originally wrote this as a longer piece, and it appears in this blog in the longer version if you care to look it up.

Here it is again, with my original title if you care to give it another shot.

Motherhood: 2050
Patty M. Luzzi
For 5/09/09

I was afraid for her very lifeline. She didn’t have the experience to know that it wasn’t evolved to leave home in this manner, but there was no way I could convince her otherwise. It all began when I caught my daughter sneaking out. I had sensed a fundamental shift in her life philosophy in the last year or so, and I knew that a confrontation was brewing.
“Where do you think you’re going?” I asked.
“I’m going to meet my friends.”
Who all is going to be there?” I tried to soften my tone.
“Just my friends.” She knew I wanted to find out if she was seeing those kids in that awful group.
“Are they necced?” I asked. Her face turned red, and she nodded.
“How could you do this to me?” I begged.
“Mom, I’m sorry, but you just don’t understand neccedness.”
“Maybe if you took the time to tell me about neccedness…all I know is what I’ve read on my screen. And I want YOU to know that it scares the chips out of me. Is it really being totally non-connected?”
“It’s no big deal! It’s about freedom. I believe in leaving my responder home once in a while. I can even look up! I saw a flight of geese last week. So beautiful!”
“But if you don’t have your responder, how can I reach you? What if there’s a pandemic?”
“Mother. You worry too much! I’ll be fine.”
“How are you going to meet a nice male if you don’t have your responder? You wouldn’t…”
“Introduce myself and shake hands? Yes, Mother, I might shake hands. You should try it, just hand touching hand…”
“I’ve lived this long without touching a stranger, and I don’t intend to start any time soon. You have no idea how you are putting yourself and this family line at risk! I worry that you’ll bring home a virulent agent from a stranger. And your clothes! Must you insist on covering so much skin?”
“Oh, this is about tats again, isn’t it? I told you, Mother, that I refuse any more tattoos. It’s barbaric! Why should I cover up my skin with so many colors? What’s wrong with going clear?”
“No self-adoring daughter of mine will go tat-less. There are inoculations you receive from tattos that are essential. I worry every time you step outside that someone will notice that you don’t have your mandatory tattoos! You could be detained AND sedated. And if that happens, I’m not hiring a professional. You’ll take whatever ugly thing you get from the public tattist.” And then with a shrug she was gone.
I never thought I would have a child who would refuse the simple conventions of life, like tattoos, responders, and news screens. I don’t want my friends to know that I have failed to instill my values in my child. I don’t want them to know she is not connected anymore, that she has embraced neccedness. Next thing you know she’ll be talking about god. Guess I’ll just have to cross that pier when I get to it.